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Category Archive for 'A Wee Bit of Irish Humor'

Irish Humor For Today

Pat and Mike were on their way home from the McGrath’s pub in Dingle and the moon was shining brightly.  Pat says to Mike, “Which do you think is the farthest, the moon or Dublin?”  Mike looked at him and said,”You must be joking, can you see Dublin from here?”

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A Bit of Irish Humor

Seamus was hailed as the most intelligent man in Ireland and was selected by the Mensa Board to enter the English Mastermind Competition. At the competition in London, Seamus was asked by the MC what his special subject was to which he replied, “Irish History.” The MC asked, “What year did the Easter Rising take […]

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Joke for Today

Two senior citizens were discussing their husbands over tea. Bridget says, “I do wish Pat would stop biting his nails. It’s very annoying.” To which Mary answers, “My Mike used to do that, but I broke him of the habit.” How?,” asks Bridget. “I hid his teeth.”

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Joke for Today

In teaching about Jonah and the whale, the teacher explained that it was impossible for the whale to have swallowed Jonah because a whale has a very small throat. One little girl insisted it had happened. The teacher became irritated and said again it was impossible. To which the wee girl replied, “When I get […]

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Humor for the Day

Pat confesses to his priest that he has been stealing building supplies for years. Fr. Tom asks, “What did you take?” “Well,”  says Pat, “enough to build my house, my two sons’ and a cottage by the lake.” “This is very serious. I’ll have to think of a suitable penance. Have you ever done a […]

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Humor for the Day

Mrs. Rafferty answers the phone in the principal’s office. A voice proclaims that Danny won’t be in school for a week. Mrs. Rafferty asks, “What seems to be the problem?” The voice answers, “The family is going on vacation.” Mrs. Rafferty says this is okay and asks who is calling. “This is my father calling.”

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Humor for the Day

Mick asked the bartender for a double shot. “I just had a fight with the wife,” he tells Charlie the bartender. Charlie asks, “How did it end?” “Oh,” Mick says, “She came to me on her hands and knees.” “Well,” says Charlie, “that’s a switch. What did she say?” Mick replied, “Come out from under that […]

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Mick O’Donnell raises his glass and says, “Here’s to my wife. She’s an angel.” To which Pat replies, “Ah, you’re lucky. Mine is still alive.”

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Irish Logic at Work

A priest visiting a remote island off Connemara asked the inhabitants how long had it been since they had been to confession. They replied that it must be four years since a priest last visited. The priest asked, “Why didn’t you go to the mainland?” To which Seamus replied, “Father, the sea is very rough, […]

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Spinster Miss Mary Murphy put an ad in the paper: “Husband Wanted!” She got over 100 replies that read: “You can have mine.”

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